• The scale has been playing hide and seek with me showing me down one pound one day and the same the next.  My jeans are getting ever looser though.  I managed to squeeze into a pair of jeans that I purchased from Ann Taylor Loft 2 months ago when I couldn’t get them up over my hips before.  They are hardly ready for prime time yet (serious muffin top), but I buttoned them at least.  I take my victories where I can!
• Week #1 of CrossFit bootcamp is in the bag and I’m loving it.  I’ve really been pushing myself again and I like the feeling.  It feels great not to finish every workout in last place – especially when everyone is so much skinnier than you.
• I’m not liking the soreness.  We do a bunch of mini-workouts in bootcamp so the chance of not being sore is slim to none.  My calves were sore for three days.  How do you get sore calves?!?  The last time this happened I had done a bunch of Turkish Get Ups and I understood the soreness.  This time – not so much.
• I did end up hanging with the Mochas for the exotic dance class.  I wore some yoga pants and a little chemise thing that used to be a short dress when I was smaller (LOL!) as a top.  My trusty old stripper shoes fit just fine.
• I had a great time and I’m glad I went.  I felt pretty good even if there is a lot more going on in the middle during hip rolls than there used to be.  I am determined to get back to pole class once things with the baby settle down.  Right now, I don’t see how I can get a consistent weekend day off (we alternate) without striking a Devil’s bargain with The Mister.
• I did great with nutrition last week until Friday.  My mother in law was in town so we got out for a rare date night.  I was craving food my favorite pizza joint and I feasted!  I had a Greek Salad with chicken (good) along with a few lemon pepper wings (not so good) and fries (ummm).   The Mister and I split a dessert.  I had to do a penalty workout at Saturday bootcamp because of my shenanigans but that food was worth every slamball!
• I was able to have my cheat meal on Friday and get right back to business on Saturday.  That made me happy.  I think I am starting to learn a little something on this program.  If 90% of the time I make really healthy choices  (not just low-calorie processed junk food), a couple of not so healthy choices once in a while will not destroy me.

• I have an irrational fear of my exercise ball now.  At the end of my pregnancy that was the only seat in the house I found comfortable so I spent a lot of time bouncing on it.  An exercise ball suddenly becomes a “birthing ball” when you are in labor.  When my water broke that Saturday morning, I remember sitting on the ball at the end of my couch rolling back and forth in extreme pain.  All of this to say that I am very hesitant now to do any videos using the ball.  It just takes me back to a place that I don’t want to be anytime soon.
• I missed my long run on Sunday morning.  I really meant to get out there but Lewis slept really poorly for a stretch and that means that I slept poorly too.  I didn’t wake up until nearly 10AM after The Mister took over baby duty.  I was actually looking forward to running…which is a great thing.
• I was randomly watching The.Brian.McKnight.Show (longtime fan of his music but comes across so phony on camera!) last weekend and Tatyana Ali was a guest.  I started reminiscing and pulled out her Kiss The Sky CD (yeah I bought it LOL).  Remember this song?
• There is another season of High School Reunion on TVLand now.  My DVR started recording it because otherwise I’d have had no idea it was on.  I love this show.  It really goes to show that most people never change…no matter how much they think they do.  The nerd back in the day still craves validation from the popular people.  It is amazing.
• I’m only halfway through last night’s LOST premiere.  I will cut anyone who spoils it for me.
• CrossFit bootcamp was awesome this morning.  I gave it my all especially during the Helen workout.  Three rounds of a short 200m sprint (more like a jog LOL), 21 kettlebell swings with 25# and 12 band pullups.  My time was 8:38 and for once I was not the last one to finish!
• My major diet struggle is wanting dessert every day.  Dessert can be a 100-calorie pack but I still want it.  Fruit alone is just not a dessert to me (unless it is floating in sugar and butter and covered in pie crust).
• Monday I had a fruit rollup for “dessert”.  Tuesday I did not have dessert.  I didn’t really want it.  I wonder if that means I’m getting better?

• I will continue to post this on Monday although I am using my measurements from Saturday.  My Precision Nutrition measurement check-ins are on Saturdays.  It is too annoying to weigh-in on Saturday and Monday.
• No weight loss this week and I completely own that one.  This week started well on the path to reducing dense carbs at non-workout times and ended up with me eating a combo at McDonald’s yesterday.  *Sigh*.  I don’t know what is wrong with me sometimes!
• This is a new month and a new day.  I’m still at 197.5 and I want to hit my quarterly goal of 185 by March 12th.  It is totally do-able if I fly right the next month and a half.
• I got my body fat measured for the PN program.  I had to find someone to do a 7-site skinfold test which is not necessarily the most accurate way to measure but if someone is skilled with the calipers it can be as much as 98% accurate.  I think it has to be a heckuva lot more accurate than that stupid Tanita scale that I have at home.  That thing put me at 44% even after a 20lb weight loss!  Since I carry most of my weight in my bottom half that method of testing is bound to overestimate me.
• My caliper test body fat came in at 29% which was absolutely not as bad as I thought it would be.  There is still much work to be done though!
• Even if this number is not accurate, a downward trend is the major focus.  I expect it to decrease throughout the 6-months of the PN program.
• My ultimate body fat goal is 20% which is considered athletic.  As a former couch potato, to ever “officially” have an athletic body would be sweet!
• I don’t feel like I’m working as hard as I can fitness-wise.  I’ve been leaving energy on the table during my workouts and that’s not my style.  I feel like there is this script in my head that goes something like “I’m bigger now so it is OK to not push myself that hard”.  “I’m a big girl…I should be out of breath…I should take a break…”  My goal this month is to stop working at 85% and give 100% again.  Size has nothing to do with effort!

I was doing well with restricting my dense carbs to post-exercise until I paid a visit to Panera Bread Company. I went there for the salads (which are awesome) not the sandwiches. There was a delicious smell wafting in from the bag that contained my salmon caesar salad. Salad doesn’t smell that good! I opened my bag up to see what was in there. Just my luck – a warm french bread loaf type thing (baguette maybe?). Why did I wolf that thing down like a like a starving woman?!? It was absolutely delicious! Next time, I’m telling them no bread.

Oh well, I do recognize that this is a process. We fall down and we get up right?

My most successful diet back in the day was Atkins.  I stayed on it for about 2 years and was the tiniest I’ve ever been in my adult life.  I actually saw 120-something on the scale.

Eventually my love of bread and potatoes got the best of me and I went back to my old ways (and weight).  I found success again with a more inclusive (but calorically restricted) diet and SparkPeople.com.  Then I had the baby so here I am again with a substantial amount of weight to lose.  This time I am using the Precision Nutrition Lean Eating coaching program.

The first PN habit was easy.  I swig some fish oil every day no problem.  Our new habit – not so easy.  The new habit is to restrict dense carbs (whole grains, brown rice, pasta, potato etc) to post-workout meals only.  Not quite Atkins, but this habit definitely requires a shift in my normal routine.  I exercise first thing in the morning so that means no starchy carbs with lunch or dinner.  I can eat fruit anytime (just not a whole ton of it), but I should be focusing more on leafy greens and other veggies.

So far, so good!  I’ve been having big salads with chicken for lunch.  I purchased and sauteed some Swiss Chard in olive oil with red pepper flakes and garlic (yum!).  I traded my normal pre-workout whole wheat bagel half for a slice of Ezekial bread (which actually doesn’t taste too bad).

At this point, I haven’t felt the dip in energy that I remember when I dropped carbs cold turkey with Atkins.  I think this more moderate approach might work out better for me.  Or so I thought until I made this recipe last night.  The chicken was excellent.  I didn’t have some items on hand so I subbed some Rotel for the fresh tomato, frozen chopped green peppers and 2% mexican cheese instead of full-fat cheese.  I paired it with some green beans.  The Mister’s reaction?  “This is good but we really need some rice to go with this!”  Hmm…I was thinking more along the lines of mashed potatoes.

I can do this and I will be better and healthier because of it.

Tax return $$ is coming in soon (yay!) and I’m allowing myself to splurge on a jogging stroller.  I am currently using a simple Snap-N-Go stroller frame type thing.  It works fine for the few times we go out and about but on simple walks in the neighborhood it isn’t too good.

I am torn between the BOB Revolution and the BOB Ironman.  I want to train for longer races later in the year and would love to hit the paved running trail with Lewis.  In fact, that taking Lewis with me may be the ONLY way I can find time to train for a half-marathon. But once Lewis grows out of his carseat the stroller frame is no good, so I want this stroller to be able to replace that stroller too.  The Ironman is better for running only (front-wheel is locked) and the Revolution is more all-purpose but supposedly not that great for jogging.

Has anyone used either of these strollers before?  Is there another type of jogging stroller that you highly recommend?  I plan to chat with the good people at my local REI store but they have a vested interest in me spending more money!

• Down 2 pounds this week to 197.5.  I can’t tell with the hip/waist measurement yet because I started measuring differently for Precision Nutrition.
• My size 14 Long and Leans from Gap are getting baggy.  I have a pair of Size 12s locked and loaded thanks to Sister P and Christmas.  I’m scared to try them on though.
• I ran my first post-pregnancy 5K Saturday.  I wanted to finish in less than 40 minutes and I did!
• I’m tossing a bunch of fitness plans around in my head right now.  I’m starting CrossFit bootcamp on Feb 1st M-W-F.  I wanted to start Insanity but I know I won’t have the time to properly do the program.  It is a 6-day a week commitment and I can’t do that with CrossFit.
• My basic cardio endurance still sucks right now.  I did another Cathe step workout this morning and I had to pause it several times.  That was with me using a 4-inch step when I used to have a 6-inch step standard.
• I still have my moves though!  I may not be able to dance but I can step and get all into it LOL.
• I think my best bet now is to do the bootcamp and go back to my basic step and cardio interval videos/workouts.  Insanity may simply be too much for me at this point.  Plus, if it is at all like CrossFit metcon workouts I don’t want to do that every day.
• Precision Nutrition has an exercise program but I am just not into it LOL.  I’ve never felt like my workouts were ineffective.  I think I do a pretty good job.  Prior to pregnancy, I was getting stronger and fitter.  My nutrition is the problem.  For the time being, I will continue with my own fitness programming.

I ran the Polar Bear 5K on Saturday and I finished!  I felt like a real runner again and it felt really good.

I started the course hoping to pace myself and run the entire thing.  Those hopes were dashed when I hit the first hill.  The course description said it was a flat course but I think they need to quantify that as “Atlanta flat” because no course in Atlanta is totally flat unless you are on the Silver Comet trail.    They are all more like rolling.  Flat = no heart attack type hills but there are always hills!

The first incline took me by surprise and I started walking to conserve my energy.  Then came another incline and another.  To be fair, these weren’t steep hills but they were just enough to tax my reserves.  I haven’t run outdoors since I stopped running during pregnancy and the treadmill just isn’t the same.  The man called 12:30 as I finished my first mile.  Sweet!  That is my treadmill pace and I was so happy to hit it given my lack of outdoor training and walking on the hill.

At mile 2, I heard 24:25.  A 12:00 min/mile despite another hill and walking break.  It must have been that “Pump It” song by Black Eyed Peas…I always start hustling to that one.  I still had to pour out a little liquor for my old (relative) speed.  My best 5K time was about 24:18.  A few years ago, I would have been eating my post-race banana at this point instead of having another 1.1 miles to go.

I went into the last mile feeling strong but desperately wishing my running watch stride sensor was working.  I think it needs a new battery or something.  I didn’t care too much about using it for pacing, but I was missing the distance display.  I like knowing that I have .4 or whatever miles to go.  It helps me push through when I’m tired.

A few more rolling hills (and walk breaks) and it was all over!  My official time was 37:18.91 which was a 12:02 min/mile.  Not bad!

I’m not sure where I want to go from here.  I want to keep running but I want to do other cardio type things (Insanity chief among them).  I have such limited time that I can’t do everything anymore.   Right now, I think I’m going to create a schedule to do Insanity and do a slow long run at least once a week so I don’t lose the ability.  I hope the super intense cardio and increased fitness to follow will help make running less demanding and lead to me being a bit faster without requiring a complete focus on running.

I have a race schedule for the year in mind but I haven’t solidified it yet.  I’m thinking half-marathon in fall and (gulp!) another full marathon next March.

I joined a group called Mocha Moms recently because I wanted to meet other moms in my area and because I want Lewis to have friends (besides little Foxy ).  I missed last month’s Girls Night Out gathering because of bad weather.  I was very much looking forward to attending this month’s activity until I got the invitation.  The activity is at the studio where I used to take pole dancing lessons – lapdance class.

I’ve actually taken this class before so it isn’t the class I’m worried about.  It’s me.  When I look in the mirror I feel so very un-ME.  I’ve always been extremely self-conscious.  I was self-conscious in pole dancing classes when I was 55 pounds lighter and now?  I’ve packed away the cheerleader shorts and tanks that I used to wear for class (never was one of those wearing lingerie to class girls LOL).  What in the world can I wear now to feel “sexy” but not like a total heifer?  What can I put on that won’t cling to my stomach and make me cringe at my silhouette?  Do my stripper shoes even fit anymore (my feet seem to have grown 1/2 size)?  Will I already know the instructor from my classes before and have to endure a double-take when they see how much weight I’ve gained?

I know the instructors of the studio are so encouraging and they are all different sizes themselves.  Maybe this is just what I need.  Maybe putting my heels back on and trying to find my new (albeit temporary) sexy at my current size is a great idea.

I don’t know.  Still undecided right now.